1. Change the name of all of our products to no longer make sense.
2. Make our web site so convoluted, so pointlessly ineffective, that users cannot cancel our services and perform simple tasks like remove credit card information from accounts.
3. Sprinkle random errors throughout our site so that even those with the patience or aptitude to navigate the ridiculous process flows cannot even perform basic tasks.
And, as a final “screw you” to the former customers we’ve vellicated to perform mass exodus, let’s spatter the site error messages with irritatingly antiquated humor to show that there isn’t one professional employee left on this sinking ship. In a post from over a year ago, I foretold Network Solutions (netsol) enacting the above three-part plan.
To a company still charging $45/yr for domains (or nsAddresses, or whatever ridiculous thing you’ve decided to call them nowadays) compared to GoDaddy’s $7.95, it’s no wonder seasoned professionals are following Bob Parsons like the Pied Piper of Hamlin.
Network Solutions: You’re entire business model is to blame for your undoing. Show some dignity and die with a little bit of pride.